Full time ministry

As church camp entered its second night, I am challenged not just by the message of the talk by Charles Gajus, pastor of GFI (Gereja Focus Indonesia), but also from a short coffee table conversation. The main idea was on 'ministry'.The talk gave the listeners some examples of people who willingly abandon the luxury of home just to spread the Gospel. Each of those individuals had one in common, they were convicted of the Gospel message. How many people do you know who willingly GO OUT to tell the good news to those who really need it, despite oppositions?
Next, the coffee table chat, was on full time ministry. This struck a chord in me. I always struggled with the question of whether I should be in a full time ministry. My father has no idea about this, apart from knowing that I love learning about God. One important characteristic of my father is he is cautious. He always see not just the good of something but also the bad. He truly has set the example of how a christian should live. My father is now working in a part time ministry as a preacher at my local church at Malaysia. One of the few people who are responsible for the founding of the church. He often quotes the Apostle Paul whenever I question about ministry.
So, what's bothering me? Why am I perplexed? As my friend shared about his plans for the Gospel, all I could think about was 'how' and 'why'. As I reflect on my life, I realise that I have sacrificed my true passion for a noble one: Architecture.To be honest, I don't love architecture. I'm not into buildings. And yet, deep inside there's a desire to serve the my home. Despite wanting to reside comfortably in Sydney, I can't help but being slapped in the face with the truth: there are barely any men fit to lead the church. Worse, some can't even read or write! How can I sit here and enjoy when back home, leadership is severely lacking?
I am an introvert. Everytime I try talk to someone, I just couldn't seem to hold a conversation for more than 5 minutes. I'll just run out of topics to talk about. If I do have a topic, I can go on and on but WITH A PRICE. I feel so drained and don't feel like to talk with anyone. Resulting me becoming an anti social. I also usually mess up during speeches. I dont say what I wanted to say. Therefore, a common product of shyness. Bottomline, I have poor "social stamina". How am I to serve the church, not to mention lead?!
Introversion and shyness are not the only problems but I leave as that for time being. Dear Lord, I seriously need COURAGE and a SOBER MIND. Too much distractions right now!